/r/tifu Analysis

Ten Most Positive Sentences

Score Sentence
0.955 boys have done stranger things, its all good, she'll laugh, you'll laugh, you'll go out for dinner, you'll introduce her to your best friend, they'll start going out...
0.941 I'll make sure this is taken care of much better." Then pick him up for a warm hug and an "I love you" and all should be well again.
0.938 Go up to her to apologise, extend your hand as if to handshake, as soon as she does the same, pull your hand away and shout in her face: "THOUGHT YOU HAD A FRIEND, BOIIII!!!
0.933 You may also want to try one of those high-pressure cans of drain un-clogger, but because of the dishwasher and twin-sink setup, it's unlikely you'll have much success. Good Luck
0.928 but I'm a guy, and not gay so uh better luck haha
0.920 Like they say beware of those who are super calm and sweet :p
0.920 Dear TIFU, last night after sexy sex a we had a sexy accident and because of all the sexiness, our sexy bits are in a sexy pickle.
0.919 I ate delicious chocolate cookies today and I wish similar delicious food onto you and also a good life.
0.919 This guy is so considerate he deserves praise, even if he falsely assumed you are Muslim it comes from a good place not a wicked one.
0.914 Lol wow dude that's pretty funny

Ten Most Negative Sentences

Score Sentence
-0.970 yeah so uh i live in a mansion and fucked all the girls at my school ever since im 12 but one time i fucked the hottest one and i fucked up so bad dude i farted can u believe
-0.964 He overreacted to an extreme overreaction, but his story isnt littered with "that bitch" "fuck this whore" etc.
-0.960 Build a million bridges but suck one dick; you're not a bridge builder, you're a dick sucker.
-0.955 And IF the person you pair up with is the type of person you could live with, then the timing doesn't matter. BUT, and this is a big one, SHITTY PEOPLE CAN HIDE HOW SHITTY THEY REALLY ARE FOR YEARS!
-0.952 >TL;DR: Teacher was a lazy ass, I was a smart ass, ended up being a dumb ass, now everyone thinks I'm an ass.
-0.950 Seriously, that's insane, I can't imagine being so socially awkward that I would puke all over my own shit to avoid telling someone I feel sick
-0.949 Dirty, petty criminals on every corner, dog shit everywhere , locals are rude and snobby af.
-0.948 Like, PMS devil raging fires of hell day, and on top of it I was having a massive panic attack about having to go to the grocery store.
-0.945 How does one accidently offend a rape victim in a dark gym at night? Wait, what is a rape victim doing in a dark gym at night?
-0.942 My pun game is pretty weak, so I have no doubt someone will immediately better this, but may i suggest as a starting point: Shit bag blames dog for shit bag...
415 of 509Ranking
3Overall Score
18Positive Score
15Negative Score
70Neutral Score
1.7%All Caps
4.0Avg Word Length